Two special people are now absent in my life. Although I carry them in my heart I missed them very much. My heart has a tendency to wonder where are the friends of one of them are now.  The close friends that I became acquainted with and loved because they said they loved her. How can you abandoned me without saying something wonderful about your dear and close friend? It would have meant so much to me if you had said something to me; and assured me that your love was true. I believe in embracing the facts and the truth. I don’t brush things under a rug and hope that it will go away. I deal with grief because I don’t want it to rise up somewhere else in the future; and rekindle what I should have dealt with in the past.  This is why I writing this message to GHOST, DOC, LONESOME AND TEE…WHAT HAPPENED? Why didn’t you say something to me when we lost someone so special in our lives.  Your condolences would have meant the world to me. So this is the only way I know how to deal with your silence and absence at time I could have used a shoulder.

This is quiet different from any post I have ever written. It is written to those who have abandoned me in the most heart wrenching time of my life; and to those who I thought would have been present and  weren’t.  I loved Pinky and she was so very close to you all. We were family too or was that just a pacification. There is a shadow of disappointment that is unresolved, but accepted it because I have no choice but to move on!  The Lord has reclaimed family members twice last year. Even so, I am standing in the power of God’s strength and love. I am slowly transitioning into new a person. God is reinventing me and I’m taking it slow, but I’m coming along. It may seem that I am lost, but I am focused on the Lord. God is restoring me in a most powerful way. It will take some time, but I am on the rise, I promise you in the name of Jesus!.

Ghost there was such an attachment that Pinky had with you. I thought you would have extend some acknowledgment in my direction. She thought a lot of Doc and Lonesome and Tee too. What happened to you all. Are your hearts made of stone? Well, I still pray for you all. I will never stop; and I pray the Lord will always watch over you and keep you safe.  If you have the heart reach out to me again.  Your sister in Christ!

Written by Reverend Jessica L. Matthews, Missionary Pastor

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